A bit about Monica & Vanessa.

Monica.

I am a Mortgage prisoner as an ex Northern Rock customer (Now with TSB- Whistletree & that’s another whole story for another day)

Why & how on earth can I be positive about this mortgage prisoner situation? What is wrong with me? – so to start the twist of positivity here, actually – what is right with me? “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change” – hearing that a few years ago was a life- changer for me. “I am choosing happiness” –

(I KNOW some of you want to spit, swear & possibly throw eggs or something else at me, when I say this, that’s fine, I get it, I’ve been there)

I am not looloolalala woooowooo totally blinkered, I am a realistic & rational person. I have though, learned over many years that choosing an optimistic view & positive thoughts, brings us far more helpful desired results in life & of course, feelings of happiness

We are the Adams family & we re-mortgaged to Northern Rock in 2007 – do I regret that decision? Yes of course! (though I can be philosophical about why & where it will lead us) It was a 75% loan to Value on our property in Bournemouth. Bryan was earning well & I operated a business from home, which was lucrative & I loved it, after Bryan was made redundant in 2008, we used the redundancy pay-out to expand the business with a premises & all was going great. We made it into the Times newspaper as one of the best places to visit in our town.

In 2009- after the financial crash affected many industries, we had no choice but to close our business & temporarily moved to live with my Mum & rented our beautiful home out to students. This was an extremely low point for me emotionally, our daughters were 3 & 7 & the disruption took a toll on us all. Bryan was getting the bus to work in a ‘temping’ job at £7.50 an hour to feed us all.

My Mental Health really suffered- I was all consumed with guilt, fear & ‘what if’ thinking & I knew I couldn’t go on like this for long. Selling our home wasn’t an option as we had barely no income, & the  further disruption of where would we go was way beyond what we could consider, as just living day to day was a priority.

I then reached out for help & referred by the GP did a 6 week course in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, which I understood & it helped, though I knew there must be so much more that was of use – this was scratching the surface! I had always dabbled with Paul Mckenna & his books on building confidence etc etc , & found it all fascinating. .I then became interested more in helping myself & read http://www.susanjeffers.com/home/5truths.cfm , I remember thinking – “OK so this could work for me” , I adopted a few pointers from it & understood how I had been thinking negatively through all this & it was just making things worse

I then spoke at a speakers event because my friend who was organising it really begged me, & thinking I was all better & moved on,  I talked about our business & closing it, I cried ,was shaking & struggling to breathe in front of everyone, it didn’t feel good & was very embarrassing. At the same event speaking about her business collapse was Rachel Elnaugh founder of Red Letter days, she recommended a book called https://www.amazon.co.uk/Become-Money-Magnet-Marie-Claire-Carlyle/dp/1848502389 which I read, & a lot of it resonated with my beliefs about money from growing up. I showed my Sister this book & she rolled her eyes as I had always been seen in my family as the one “who always wants more” –my parents quote

My sister though surprised me & a few weeks later, & messaged me with the link to https://www.thesecret.tv/ - she had watched the hour long film, loved it & embraced all the ideas & resources that they offer.

We watched this – bought the book & Yes, I can say categorically hand on heart from that moment. our lives changed for the better. We have followed all the books & will gladly share information to lead to them & how they worked for us.

This was in 2011, I was then captivated & totally believed. I went on to re-train to be a Life coach, NLP master practitioner therapist & Hypnotherapist. My first contract was for a company delivering workshops for the DWP for the long -term unemployed. I did this for 2 years, whilst gaining 2 training qualifications & am now trained to deliver many wellbeing & health & safety subjects. I am a First Aid for Mental Health instructor, up to Level 3 & in lock down have taken a qualification in Understanding Young People & Children’s Mental Health . I have had to do this all resourcefully on a very limited budget & with a long term health condition which can debilitate (another positivity issue!)  so…. no easy bullet anywhere.  In 2018 Bryan was made redundant again & has now re-trained himself to join me in our training business, because at age 52, traditional employment options proved to be limited

Are we still a mortgage prisoner? – well kind of, & certainly the story isn’t over for us (watch this space).

Am I always a positive Pollyanna??  (interestingly one of my favourite films as a child https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pollyanna_(1960_film) It may be worth a watch for some )  NO WAY!  It’s a daily decision to be there in the land of being kind, mindful, positive , & determined & it takes effort.

Only a small amount of effort though can achieve mega results – It’s surprising and a relief!  Of course I have days where I am not feeling it at all – it doesn’t mean I’m back to ‘Negative Nellie’ forever, you can have a rubbish day & then sleep on it & then decide to do a happier one the next.

The Law of attraction & being positive has helped us through a series of steps. If you follow (or even dip &in & out of) the information, we share on here & more of our journey, you may find something that works for you.  We very much hope that reading it & being pointed to the resources we used will provide you with some support, guidance, or solutions.

I absolutely dream of a day when this ‘Mortgage Prisoner’ situation is an issue we ALL have moved on from & that has changed our lives for the better ( Long shot  for some of to think of at the moment, I appreciate ) Though if we’re being positive – its not far away (see what I did there ?!)

My aim for now, is to offer you some simple signposts, tools & ideas to help you to choose to feel happier in some moments & more positive on some days, & even possibly ‘in control’ over all whilst we are all working towards freedom from this situation

Vanessa.

I am a Mortgage Prisoner – trapped with Landmark.

I have struggled with anxiety on and off for years. Over the years I have tried various methods for coping with life’s ups and downs. I have always believed in holistic treatment but struggled with the overwhelming feeling of anxiety.

We moved in 2006 to our family home. We received the keys, the day I gave birth to our second son.  The happiest time of our lives; two lovely boys and our lives ahead of us. The struggle to pay our bills / Mortgage took effect almost immediately. My husband and I both had a couple of jobs just to stay afloat. As we knew that this level of work would not be sustainable my husband trained as an electrician though that only gave us respite for a period of time. We then hit recession in 2008 & our mortgage was taken over when Northern Rock was nationalised for a time

My husband went on to do a degree. I had picked up a second job and he also worked as a baker as well as studying. We were then trapped into paying a high mortgage rate when the lower rates had been brought in for so many to help through austerity. Then the affordability rates changed which meant being assessed we would not be eligible for a cheaper monthly payment. Times were hard our children missed out on social activities holidays and sports this was what motivated us to make these changes for our children.

In 2018 I trained as a mindfulness coach running workshops for children and teenagers. I work with my sister for her company called universal mindfulness.  http://universalmindfulness.co.uk/ - check out our tips on her blog & website

This change in career changed my life. I really want to help people change their way of thinking and teach coping tools and techniques to allow our minds to be calmer.